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In Days in Edmonton, Overcasted Mind, Wanderlogue

Winter Wonderland

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Winter Wonderland

Winter has witnessed me blossoming into a better version of myself, and the opposite. It’s the season where I got to explore new boundaries of what I was capable of feeling. Some of my best days indeed involved a sight of endless pile of white ice, but some of the worst did as well. It has seen some of my loudest laughs and some of my worst cries, and every confusion in between. It brought along some of the days that I’d miss a lot, and some others that I’d rather completely forget.

Winter, for me, was a time of forgiveness. Of independence, of figuring out what truly matters and what does not, of redemption. When there was too much emotion, yet too little space in one’s heart to process.

But it was a beautiful sight. Regardless of seconds, minutes, hours, days, which turned into weeks, which might turn into months, where I was aching; it was nonetheless always a beautiful scenery to remember those times by.

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In Days in Edmonton, DIY and Artsy-Craftsy, Life on the Equator

Recollections of Sanctuary

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Recollections of Sanctuary

Ever since I took my first office gig in Jakarta last year, I’ve been moving across a couple of temporary housings in the city. “Kostan” is what we call those accommodations here in Indonesia, which is basically almost like a mix of a dormitory (but not only for students) and shared house (although some of them don’t quite look like a house, especially since some of them are not equipped with parking lot, living room, laundry facilities, or even a kitchen).

Funnily enough, none of them ever felt quite as “comfortable” as an actual place to relax and unwind by the end of the day for me. Although in the context of proper beddings, furniture, and facilities which help me to fulfil my basic needs of a shelter, they are indeed physically comfortable. It’s just that none of them ever feels like a “safe haven” that I would gladly spend a whole week inside, unlike some of my previous temporary bedrooms. (I was even almost gone mad the first two weeks of WFH and quarantine, before I decided to stay with my family in Bandung instead.)

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In Days in Edmonton, Impulsive Writing

Memory from a drizzly afternoon spring

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Memory from a drizzly afternoon spring

Edmonton, Spring 2018

There is something quite liberating about chilling on the balcony of your third-floor apartment in a rainy afternoon, under the huge, shady trees, just letting the rain shower your bare skins as you embrace the spring breeze. For a moment, forgetting about those unsettling emotions and unfinished chores. Breathe, let loose. Smell the dry earth. Sing a farewell ode to snows.

I think the majority of us often forgets to appreciate the small details that make life hurt slightly less, and enlighten the world slightly more.

In Days in Edmonton, Thoughtful Enlightenment

“Befriend” them, even if you’re scared to.

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“Befriend” them, even if you’re scared to.

Awhile back, I came across a blog post that was becoming somewhat viral at that moment, particularly among the Indonesian students overseas. It was written by an Indonesian student residing in a European country, who was describing how she always finds that the majority of Indonesians in that country seem to have always been only socializing with their own communities of Indonesians and rarely seem to be engaged with either the locals or the more internationally diverse communities. P.s.: she belonged to the opposite group.

For her, maybe her comfort zone is indeed in the circle of the locals. For others, maybe their comfort zone is people who share the same background, thus easier to pass along the jokes with or relate in any way. While it’s probably cool that someone enjoys being in the company of a diverse group of people just because not many people might even like that idea, it also makes the most sense for someone to be the happiest when surrounded by a rather homogenous society which shares the most similarities with them. Especially when it comes to the cultural or religious background that further defines our core values and general perspectives about life, which really accounts for who do you pick as your comfort friends eventually. Who would enjoy feeling constantly challenged just because they’re surrounded by those who do not see the world the way they do? It is absolutely just easier to live with those whom with we could be at peace together, is it not?

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In Days in Edmonton, Wanderlogue

Winter in Canadian Rockies

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Winter in Canadian Rockies

It was my first travel with the U of A Outdoors Club without my usual pals of the club. I remembered that I decided to go, even without telling them that I signed up because I knew that I had to find a new circle. Whether I liked the idea or not, I had to develop a new comfort zone. People who would get along well with me, and maybe share the same passion or interest with me too, to make it easier. Of courseย then this trip made the perfect sense. First of all, it was the Outdoors Club, whom people are pretty much equivalent to ITB’s LFM in a way that the majority of us listens to the similar type of indie pop/alternative/indie rock music, and we freakin’ love travels. Secondly, this particular trip was called Photography Trip, so it resembled LFM on a whole new level now. And it would make the most sense for me to find one or two new friends from the trip–that hopefully would help me to reconnect with new people.

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In Days in Edmonton, Playlist

If my current life were a TV series, these would be the theme songs:

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If my current life were a TV series, these would be the theme songs:

Sometimes when I was casually strolling on the rustic sidewalk on one of those days back in the Fall, particularly early in the day when the daybreak just rose, or later when the yellow shades of afternoon just turned gold and the evening breeze began to nudge my cheeks, I imagined if I had actually been living in a TV series. (And all this messed up reality is actually just a fake show, ha! Well, I wish.) There would be a camera shooting from one side of my moving feet, then another one from the tip of my right eye which was staring straight onto the avenue, and another one just across my lips that were mumbling some lyrics that I remembered from these songs.

The story begins when a girl feels like she’s misplaced in this small town, and she struggles to find a circle where she really fits in, without feeling like she has to try all the time.

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